Horizon
by zibzabzoobity
Summary: Direct sequel to "Shoreline." Remus and Tonks discuss and make plans for their future together. AU


Tonks was fiddling with her hair all morning. It was still early when she woke and Remus was still asleep. When they were together Remus rarely woke after her and she wanted to relish the moment….and she also wanted to figure out what to do with her hair.

Morphing was harder than she remembered it being, but she managed to turn her eyes into a shade of blue that complimented her hair, just for practice. When she returned to the living room she found Remus was gone.

"Remus?"

She darted through the house, making a sweep through the kitchen, bedroom and guest bathroom, he was nowhere to be found. Eventually she made it to the window above the sink where she looked out onto the ocean and she saw him there. He was swimming not too far from the shore, riding the waves and letting them push him back towards land, he looked thoroughly content.

Smiling, she ran outside to meet him. She had lived with Remus long enough to know that the wind would carry her scent down to him and he would be aware of her presence long before she reached him. The wind had whipped her midnight blue hair about her head, ruining Tonks's hard work in the bathroom mirror, but seeing Remus's face light up as she approached the shore, she didn't care.

He trudged through the water and she got a good look at him as the sun shone on him with crisp, morning light. He was clad in nothing but a pair of tight black pants that fell to his knees, and his wet hair clung to his eyes and obscured his face, leaving Tonks's to gaze upon his exposed torso and legs. His body glittered from wetness, drops of water clinging to his thinly-furred chest and stomach. She could make out the claw marks that littered his frame but the sun did a good job of blowing them out in the light, even the large bite on Remus's left shoulder was barely visible. He was a healthy weight, and in far better shape with thin, sinewy muscles wrapping around his slight build making him appear wiry and fit. Tonks couldn't stop grinning at how much more physically attractive Remus had become in just three years.

"Hey there!" she said with playful flirtation.

"Dora! Your hair!" said Remus, an enormous grin spread across his face, he looked absolutely gorgeous. He quickly closed the gap between them and pulled Tonks into a tight embrace, which he quickly retreated from. "Oh! I'm sorry! Look, I've got you all wet now."

Tonks laughed and looked down at her (or rather Remus's) slightly damp shirt. "Just a bit. Did I disturb your swim? You looked rather happy out there."

He let out a breathy laugh and looked back at the sea behind him. "No not at all." Then, suddenly, Remus's expression became grim, and Tonks saw that he could no longer look her in the eye.

"Remus, what is it?" she said. She took his chin between her fingers and pulled his face down into hers, yet his eyes still would not meet hers. "Talk to me."

"I just remembered…I had planned to spend the next full moon out there…"

At first Tonks did not understand. Why would Remus go out to swim on the night of the full moon? Then it hit her, and her eyes welled up with tears. "Oh, Remus…you…?"

He pulled his face free of her grip, and looked down at his sand-encrusted feet. "I figured…three years…you would have moved on, gotten on without me, found someone else. But you were all I had left. The Ministry wouldn't allow me to live like a normal person so I moved out here. But the loneliness killed me. I would be a burden on anyone I chose to share my life with. I didn't think there was any option left for me." He was muttering, wringing his hands in front of him like a schoolboy being reprimanded.

Tonks pressed the tears from her eyes with the heel of her hand. "Remus, there was never anyone else. Ever. I wanted to respect your need for space, that's why I waited so long. If I had known what you had planned to do I would have come sooner. Fuck, I never would have let you leave at all!" Remus laughed and looked up at her, his lips forming the smallest of smiles.

"I'm sure plenty of people would have tried and stop me if they knew what I had planned. Hence why suicide attempts aren't normally social affairs." They both laughed. Remus turned and looked out at the horizon. "I thought…it would be a clean death. No body. No mess. Molly would just come by the next morning and find the note I left." He laughed again. "So you can imagine your appearance on my doorstep last night felt somewhat like divine intervention."

"Damn right it was!" Tonks pulled Remus into a tight hug not minding that he was now soaking through her clothes with seawater. It was several heartbeats before she felt Remus return her embrace. She could feel his nose press into the top of her head and inhale deeply, something he had done when they first shared an embrace. "I love you so much Remus."

"I love you too."

* * *

Tonks prepared breakfast while Remus showered. She was happy to find that his kitchen was well stocked, remembering the bare cupboards and shelves of Remus's flat back during the war. She was able to put together a meal of bacon, eggs and toast, lathered with butter and salt. It was all cooked and plated by the time Remus emerged from his bedroom clad in clean clothes.

"Merlin Remus! Did you even think to buy yourself some new clothes with all that money? How old are those trousers?" said Tonks gesturing violently to Remus's darned and knee-worn trousers.

He gave a light laugh, which surprised her. Remus never had much of a sense of humor when it came to his manner of living. "Hey, these trousers have seen me through some rough times, I can't just toss them away now that I can afford new ones."

"Don't talk about your bloody trousers like they have feelings! I'm taking you out shopping this week." She turned and set their breakfast down at the dining room table, careful not to disturb the piles of papers that had accumulated on it. "Sit!" she gestured to the chair across from her.

Remus sat and they began their breakfast in brief silence. "What's all this then?" she asked, peeking over the top of one of the stacks of papers.

"I've been doing some freelance writing for one of the local papers in the village nearby."

"And it creates this much paperwork?" she asked with eggs in her mouth. Remus took his time chewing his food and swallowing it before answering.

"This is all part of the research, not my actual articles. The villagers around here are fans of local lore. I've been researching into the rumor of the leviathan camped out near the shores around here."

Tonks raised her eyebrows at this. "Really? A leviathan?" She nearly choked on a hunk of bacon she was chewing when she came to a realization, "Remus you were _swimming _out there!"

He laughed. "It's not legitimate Dora. Most of this is research I've been doing is to debunk the rumor. That's more or less what my articles have been about." He laughed again and shook his head, "actually I received a letter from a disgruntled reader a few months ago who said my articles are sucking the mystery out of life. He was a muggle."

Tonks puffed out a laugh. "But you've been enjoying writing them though?"

He nodded, "yes. It's kept me occupied. I gave up looking for a real job years ago," he said with no bitterness in his voice.

Tonks nodded at this. She had always tried to help find Remus a well-paying job, it was never about the pay as it was about helping Remus feel like a normal human being. She began to wonder if some good really did come out for Remus now that the war was over. The Ministry had to officially recognize Remus as a war hero and give him the same recognition as the other Order members that fought at the Battle of Hogwarts otherwise they were sure of some severe media backlash. And now with Kingsley and Mr. Weasley enjoying their promotions the pair had been working relentlessly to repeal the anti-werewolf legislation that Dolores Umbridge had instilled years back.

"This is great, Dora," said Remus, jolting Tonks from her thoughts.

"Thanks."

"I don't quite remember your cooking ever being this…not burnt."

She tossed a hunk of her toast at him and they both laughed.

There had been something floating between the two since they had resolved their three-year absence from one another's lives. And that was what the future would look like now. Tonks bit back tears at the very thought of knowing Remus had resolved that he had no future…enough to simply end his life. But she was here now and she simply could not leave him again, and she didn't believe either of them wanted her to.

"So what do we do now, Remus?" Tonks asked abruptly. Remus looked up at her with a mouthful of food and stared at her blankly, taking his time chewing and swallowing before answering.

"What do you mean?" he asked. Tonks huffed, he was avoiding the subject.

"You know what I mean. I mean…breakfast is going to be over soon…what then?" Remus didn't answer her. He simply began tearing off hunks of bread and popping them in his mouth. "Would you like me to stay?" Remus shook his head and looked down at his plate. "Why not?"

"You can't be apparating from here to the Ministry every day."

"Then why don't you come stay with me? I mean…my flat's small but we could make it work…" Again, Remus shook his head. "Then what? You think after what you told me out there on the beach I'm just going to get up and be gone from your life again? …Remus." She reached out and touched his hand gently. "I love you more than you can possibly understand. I know you feel the same way. Let's figure this out."

Remus looked up at her and she could see something behind his bright blue eyes crack and falter. It had taken three years for Remus to finally break and admit that he needed her, even if it was with just a look.

"I like it here. The Ministry has a Scotland branch you know. What if I look into applying for a transfer?" She suggested, getting excited about the prospect of living on the beach of Scotland with Remus.

Remus seemed to sense her excitement and gave her a wry smile. "If you really want to do that."

Tonks gave him a grin and nodded vigorously, "I really do."

* * *

It was made official rather quickly. Tonks commuted between her job in London and Remus's cottage for about a week before her request for a transfer was approved. Almost the entire Weasley brood, along with the trio, Harry, Ron and Hermione, aided in bringing Tonks's belongings to the cottage via floo network the weekend after Tonks's transfer was approved.

For most, it had been the first time they had seen Remus in years. Everyone had similar reactions and remarks as to Remus's improved physique and health. It had been a fun occasion for everyone helping Tonks set up her belongings in Remus's house. Remus, Arthur, Ron and Harry were in charge of making the necessary additions to the cottage, like a second closet and larger bathroom. The women set about decorating the cottage with Tonks's possessions without overpowering what Remus had set up beforehand.

When evening rolled around Molly, Ginny, Fleur and Hermione prepared a grand dinner with fresh supplies from the village down the road. They ate on the newly-added patio outside that overlooked the sea.

When Tonks caught Remus accepting a plate of ham and mashed potatoes from Mrs. Weasley she couldn't help but grin at how truly happy he looked.

When Tonks first came to Remus that night, yes, physically, he did look healthier, but his eyes and expression seemed sad and almost vacant. While his body spoke of days spent swimming outside and finally getting three square meals a day, his face spoke of years of unwanted solitude and longing. Now, Remus was finally complete. He was finally happy.

"I do apologize for my…absence. I've been made well aware that some of you were worried about me." Remus said to his dinner guests as the evening began to wind down.

"It's quite alright Remus. We're just so happy you've finally let _yourself _be happy!" said Hermione who reached over and took Remus's hand and gave it a squeeze. Tonks saw frequently the sad, longing stares Hermione had been giving Remus all day. Like Tonks, Hermione had not seen Remus in three years and worried about him too.

Tonks and Remus bid everyone farewell as everyone took their leave around midnight.

"You look tired," said Tonks who was standing in the center of the living room with Remus, holding him around the waist.

"You forget the moon is coming in two days," he said with a sleepy smile.

"Oh bugger! I did forget!" Tonks withdrew herself from him to seize handfuls of her own hair (which, during the course of the day, faded down to a deep maroon color) "Do you have everything you need? I can run to the shop tomorrow and get-"

Remus let out a chuckle and lazily draped his arms across Tonks's shoulders. "You seem to also forget I've been dealing with the moon on my own for three years now."

"Do you have Wolfsbane?"

Remus nodded. "I have a deal with a potions master in the village. I send him payment at the beginning of the month and he sends and owl with it every morning the week prior to the moon. He's a nice man actually."

Tonks laughed, "actually?"

"The man I had dealt with in Diagon Alley was not very fond of my kind. He would constantly remind me he would only brew it because he didn't want to feel morally responsible if I wreaked havoc on the townsfolk. Then Severus was never a pleasant man to have to ask favors of either."

Tonks dipped her head into Remus's chest and laughed again, "potions masters must just be an unpleasant bunch on the whole. With a few exceptions."

"Much like werewolves."

Tonks looked up at him and he smiled down at her, leaning in to give her a kiss.

When they parted their lips Tonks said, "please don't spend the moon in the cellar. If you have the Wolfsbane, spend the moon with me."

Remus nodded and pulled her in closer. "I think I will."

* * *

Like Remus had said, at around six in the morning, a large barn owl was scratching at the bedroom window. Tonks was the one who let the owl in to deliver the large phial of Wolfsbane. The owl swooped into the room and presented its parceled leg to Tonks who took the phial from the creature, who subsequently nipped at her hand, expecting payment. The only thing Tonks could find in time was some leftover ham from the evening before which satisfied the creature and it quickly took its leave.

Remus emerged from the shower looking contemplative when he saw the phial in Tonks's hand. "Archimedes came already?" he asked curiously.

"Yeah," she held the phial out to him. "Took a bit of my finger with him."

Remus let out a low chuckle and presented his hand to Tonks who saw he had a small gallery of small, nearly-healed cuts on his fingers. "He's a very impatient thing." He took the phial from Tonks who pulled his hand to her lips and gave a few kisses on his cuts in quick succession. "If kisses could heal I think I would have stopped being a werewolf long ago." Tonks gave him a warning look and stormed off into the kitchen to prepare breakfast.

When Remus came out into the kitchen Tonks was still preparing breakfast with some ferocity. "You're being awfully quiet…" Remus said with some apprehension in his voice. Tonks knew she needed to quickly explain herself otherwise Remus would get the wrong idea as to why she was being so quiet.

"It's nothing to do with you…well…it _is…_I just…I don't really know why I'm so mad…" in her fervor Tonks dropped an egg on the floor, she cursed and vanished it with a jerky flick of her wand.

Remus came up behind her and rested his hands on her shoulders. "Is it about the moon?"

Tonks shook her head in frustration. "I just had these stupid ideals back during the war…that everything was going to be a thousand times better with Voldemort and all the rest of them gone but…it's not. You're still a werewolf. You're still in pain. And I'm still incapable of helping in any way."

"You've helped me more than you give yourself credit for." He pulled his arms around her and gave her a firm hug from behind.

"But it's not enough. And it'll never be enough…" she turned around to face him and looked up at him with a stern, determined gaze. "If I could tear the wolf out from within you and hurl him into the sea I would."

Remus burst out laughing and pulled her tighter into his embrace. He lowered his head down on the top of hers and was taking in deep inhales of her hair. Tonks liked the sensation more than she would ever let Remus know, so she remained silent as she buried her face in his chest, lulled into some kind of sober state of consciousness by the light thumping of his heart.

* * *

By the time sunset had come Tonks had nearly forgotten about the aforementioned moon until Remus came walking into the living room wearing nothing but a towel that was wrapped around his waist. Tonks jumped up from her seat in alarm, "bugger! Sorry dear I was all caught up in my—"

Remus just gave her a lopsided smirk and held up his hand, "it's alright Dora. It's not your responsibility, it's mine. Now…are you going to watch too or…?" he dropped off, looking slightly wary of what Tonks was going to say.

She quickly weighed the pros and cons in her head, ultimately winning out that Remus would probably feel more comfortable if he didn't transform with an audience. "I can go in the bedroom until you're done," she said, Remus didn't protest but went and sat over on the sofa before a roaring fire that Tonks had lit in the fireplace.

Tonks walked over and sat beside him, she turned to regard him but his gaze was fixed on the fire before them, the flames creating a golden glow in Remus's eyes. "I still have time," he finally said, "moon isn't coming up for another hour."

"So you just couldn't wait another hour to get naked in front of me?" Tonks asked teasingly.

Remus smiled but still did not look at her. "Sometimes I'm a little off about when moonrise is. Better to be safe than sorry. I don't feel like buying new clothes."

"Although you should. I've seen your closet Remus, I don't think you've bought yourself new clothes since…blimey! When's the last time you've gone shopping Remus?"

He puffed out a laugh and finally looked at her, "I don't really ever need to. I'm quite handy with patching and darning and I get enough jumpers from Molly every holiday."

They spent that hour talking. It was always something that came rather easily for the two of them, conversation just came naturally, nothing ever faked or forced or uncomfortable about it. They quickly lost track of the time and during Tonks's tale about Moody's replacement eye Remus began gasping violently, he fell from the couch onto all fours and his gasps turned into groans, his groans quickly turning to shrieks as the transformation began to take hold of him.

Tonks promised she would leave the room, but her instincts to protect Remus overpowered her and she quickly dropped to the floor, wrapping her arms around Remus's shoulders and holding him close, Remus was in too much pain to protest.

She could feel the bones shifting beneath her, muscles twitching and hair growing. She heard Remus's voice deepen into feral yelps and when the process was finally over, the enormous hulking wolf that had replaced Tonks's lover, fell to the ground in a heap, breathing heavily.

Tonks pulled away to drink in his new form, she had seen plenty of illustrations during her research into lycanthropy back when she had first learned of Remus's condition, but most of those illustrations included the werewolf tearing at the throat of an unsuspecting victim, but the creature that lay before her was nothing like the books had described.

The wolf was remarkably pitiful. Thin skin stretched taut over bones, covered in fine grey hairs all over save for wherever there was scar tissue, including the bite mark on his shoulder. For its sheer size, the animal was rather thin and delicate looking, Tonks noticed the wolf began to shiver and she heard it give the faintest whimper, for a moment she had forgotten this was the werewolf that lurked in the woods, the beast that preyed on young children and turned them into monsters, the thing her parent's always warned her about.

"Remus?" asked Tonks. His eyes were closed but when they pried open she saw they glowed the most iridescent golden color. She reached out and scratched the wolf between his pointed ears; he let out a long groan of pleasure in response. "You tired?" she asked, not really knowing what to get back as an answer.

Remus keened in response and Tonks took that as a "yes."

"Do you wanna hop up on the couch?"

Again another keen, this time Tonks wasn't sure how to interpret it. When it didn't look like Remus was going to be moving any time soon Tonks scooted closer, leaning up against the couch she gently pulled Remus's giant wolf head into her lap and continued scratching between his ears.

The evening went by with Tonks scratching Remus on his head as she stared blankly into the dying embers of the fire. Her wand was on the couch just out of reach and she was pinned between Remus's head and the floor, yet she didn't feel trapped. Eventually her mind began to wander, and one thought immediately jumped into focus…if she had not shown up when she did, tonight would be the night that Remus would swim out into the sea to die…

How different would tomorrow be for her? For everyone? When Molly would arrive to check on him only to find an empty cottage with a suicide note on the table? A tear slipped from her, rolling down her cheek and disappearing into the thick fur of Remus's head below. She never figured fate was an actual thing, something that actually existed. But when her impeccably timed visit to Remus's cottage prevented so much pain and loss…what else was she supposed to call that?

She looked down at Remus, who was fast asleep now, she had been told by more than one person that Remus suffers more than anyone could ever know. It was Sirius who had said that she was one of the few good things he had in his life. She never took it seriously, but she recognized over the last few weeks how much he needed her, and how much she needed him.

"I'm not leaving. You hear me, Remus? Never." She knew he did not hear her, she hoped that he had heard her on some unconscious level and that was enough for her.

* * *

When morning came Tonks was awoken by the sound of wolfish yelping coming from the bedroom, signaling that Remus was transforming back to himself again. This time she stayed in the living room until she heard the wolfs yelps and whimpers die down into very human moans.

She approached the bedroom door and knocked, "Remus? Remus. I'm coming in alright?"

When she opened the door Remus had quickly yanked off a sheet from the bed to cover himself. He was sweating and shaking violently, clumps of damp hair falling in his eyes. Tonks rushed over to his side, brushing the hair from his face.

"Are you alright honey? Do you need anything?" she asked hurriedly.

He didn't say anything but weakly shook his head, most of his attention was focused on evening out his breathing. Tonks pulled one of his arms around her shoulders and began lifting him up onto the bed, he grunted but Tonks brushed it off and began pulling his legs up onto the bed.

The sheet pooled about his waist, he lay there on the bed, eyes closed and face cross in a grimace of pain. Tonks stood before him and awaited instruction.

When Remus's breathing seemed to have died down to slow, even breaths, and his face finally relaxed, Tonks bent foreword and brushed the hairs from his sweat-matted brow and gave him a quick peck just above his eyebrow.

"Darling? Can you hear me? Do you need any potions for the pain? I have—"

"Marry me."

Tonks froze in place, looking down at Remus completely aghast. His eyes were still closed and he hadn't moved at all, for a moment she wondered if she misheard him…and then he said it again.

"Marry me…" This time Remus opened his eyes, they were bloodshot and glassy, Tonks felt him take a weak grip of her hand with his and he looked her in the eye. "Please Dora…marry me." His gaze slowly drifted over to the bedside table, he was eyeing a drawer. "Open it…"

Tonks let go of Remus's hand and pulled open the drawer. "The box…" she hard Remus rasp.

She dug through the drawer until her hand came in contact with a small metal box. Trembling, she pried it open with one hand and inside was a small silver ring. Her eyes immediately welled up with tears and she looked down at Remus, grinning ear to tear.

"My mother's…" he said, Tonks saw his eyes begin to drift closed. "Do you…?"

"Yes," said Tonks breathily, quickly bending foreword to give Remus a passionate kiss on the lips.

She heard him give a weak moan of pleasure, when she pulled away her fiancée was fast asleep.


End file.
